my life as written by sleaford mods

  1. 2 years ago

    listened to meat murder
    then ordered a burger

  2. I'm trying to get by on no sleep, no rest
    But the naff cunt in the next cube
    A real laugh at your own joke fucker
    Is repeating the same story about a time
    In a pub he had a pint with David Cameron's sister's gardener's bestie
    Fuck off

  3. bravo, classical!

    six organs, lightning bolt
    i missed these, forgot or Im all about
    drag queens and the couch
    shame is useless, guilt is
    toothless

  4. listening to tied up in notz on my iPod speakers amplified by a beer bottle.
    angel stop zed ladbrokes m&s pants.

  5. @srobot bravo, classical!

    six organs, lightning bolt
    i missed these, forgots

    I remembered six organs right after you left tv bunker night. doh!

  6. drag queens and the couch
    drag queens at the bar being forced to
    two screens since the Porcelain Giraffe from Middle Earth
    lit out for the territories
    HEY hey where's the hockey game
    the hockey game
    the hockey game
    the hockey game is all around you
    you daft sweatpants wank
    I give as many fucks as you do about
    hashtag justice for whoever
    hashtag justice isn't real justice anyway

  7. That probably doesn't have enough urine in it. Maybe I need to go back to the 90's, what the fuck, get my wallet stolen. I wish I was in The Tenderloin, now THAT is where the piss is AT.

  8. Edited 2 years ago by orbit

    Simple twat thinks he's clever because he knows a bunch of metal bands nobody gives a shit about
    30 second listens on youtube,
    soundcloud the fruit of pointless labors, this cassette ain't real true, it's real crap
    you can't scare your mum with it, mate
    she helped you sew your backpatches

  9. zom

    23 Apr 2015 Doors Fans

    Riding the fucking 21a twat-bus
    Can of Grain Belt Nordeast hidden drink fucking stinks here more beer
    Back to fucking Hopkins shit oh fuck maybe I'm Craig Finn

  10. IPA, aye, that's why I'm
    Haggard, not like Merle, cock

  11. Mate, you think I won't fake a phone call
    To get outta havin to look at pictures
    Of yr grubby kid?
    Cuz I will
    Fucker's got a terrible haircut

  12. took a bluey and crashed the GS
    because
    Salford Lads is closed now
    Innit
    Can't wait for season 5 of "Louie"
    windswept rain Shaggs the Moors
    and hapless commuters coming off the M5 roundabout motorway
    alright, son, I give up
    tears reflecting from all ten of my fragmented rear views
    Love Reign Oarfolkjokepus, it isn't there anymore
    But the posters remain
    Missed Dot Wiggen by three hours last Saturday
    In Portland, Maine

  13. YOGA MIRROR

    fuck fuck fuck stuck
    in traffic on 55 firetrucks make all dead stop
    fuck late stuck stuck by

    YOGA MIRROR

    feet pound just past my skull shit
    are those my tits am I that fat
    fuck mumble teacher in the

    YOGA MIRROR

    all i can hear is when the sweat
    shorts out your bluetooth i am
    old and deaf middle age on stage in the

    YOGA MIRROR

  14. sleaford mods is a terrible, humourless band

  15. zom

    25 Apr 2015 Doors Fans

    Oh so you only like funny bands now?

  16. he's only into hearing the right stuff™

  17. ^

  18. Edited 2 years ago by fecundstump

    i'm thinking that for everything i do now i'll describe the genre as The Right Stuff™ so if people think it sucks no fans can retort with that

  19. ya man, give em the Tom Wolfe Treatment!

  20. Edited 2 years ago by the Classical

    Oy you think it's humorless mate?
    I suppose not all music can be bougie geezers
    Playing farty fake doo-wop with mediocre guitar solos cannit?
    Now that's proper entertainment!

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